Why I Am an Atheist

I do not believe that there is a God or that anything happens after you die. I don’t acknowledge any religions and believe the world would be better off if there were none.

I did not always believe this.

I was brought up in the Episcopal Church where I attended youth groups and bible studies. I also spent a few years going to Young Life meetings on top of spending 8 summers of my life at a Christian camp up in New Hampshire. I would travel to the local Christian college every Sunday night to pray and sing praise songs. I loved God and Jesus for all they had done for me.

I would say I first starting questioning my beliefs during our weekly bible studies where I would travel to the local college and meet with some kids I knew from camp and high school. It was there that we would take turns constructing our own bible studies trying to answer life’s questions. That is where my life changed.

How I Challenged My Beliefs

It started with an idea. The idea that something omniscient, omnipotent and omnipresent would have human enough emotions that it needed to be loved. A skydaddy of sorts, pulling the strings with the single goal of having its puppet children choose to love him. This was the Pandora’s Box that sent my brain spiraling and I had to find some answers.

One of my idols growing up was C.S. Lewis. Reading the Chronicals of Narnia as a child inspired my mind and helped me dream up great things. Later, the Screwtape Letters and Mere Christianity would define my beliefs and sculpt me into the Christian I was. His ideas of natural law made complete sense to me and became the foundation of my arguments when defending Christianity. After my great revelation I began to dig deeper into the question “Where do our morals come from?”. Finally I’ve settled on the fact that over time, we realized that by working together for the greater good we can succeed in greater numbers.

Looking back I can’t believe I ever truly thought getting my morals from religion was a good thing.

I’ve seen so much hate come from religion it sickens me. People judging others based on their beliefs, sexual orientation and the color of their skin. Some of the things I learned from the Bible disgust me when I remember the verses in hindsight.

Then I started learning more about our country’s history and some of the quotes from people like George Washington, Ben Franklin and Thomas Jefferson that expressed a distaste for religion. While searching I also ran across the teachings of Richard Dawkins and Christopher Hitchens which solidified beyond any doubt that the atheist point of view was the correct one.


Coming to the realization that I am a process of evolution and a scientific miracle gives me new purpose in life. My mere spark of consciousness is a gift I refuse to take for granted. Hopefully some day we will be free of religion which has stifled scientific and moral progress.

All of that said, I leave you with this. I may not be able to change your mind about what you believe. A good friend told me “Do not take your one chance at life for granted for one second. You will not live to regret it.” I hope someday you can do the same.


Photo by Napalm filled tires

Last night, on the way home from the bar, my friend asked me something I never expected to here him say. “Do you believe in God”. My first reaction was to laugh which caught him off guard because he thought I was a “Jesus Freak” because of my history with bible studies, Christian camps, youth groups, etc. So he asked why and I proceeded to make a few quick points.

Well, my main point is it just seems very ridiculous when you think about it. As far as disproving common ideas about Christianity, I’ll leave that to Religulous by Bill Maher.

But seriously, does it not seem logical that we would make up gods to explain the things we didn’t understand. The only valid argument I see is what C.S. Lewis called “natural law”. Our inner realization of right and wrong. I personally credit it to our history of learning how we need to act to survive … but if you wanna say its a little voice in your head then that’s all good.

So I’ve always just not cared and not believed but it wasn’t until Bill Maher’s Religulous that I began to see how much religion is hurting civilization. So many hate crimes, wars and well … just really stupid things are being done in the name of religions.

But I’ve also been there. Ive defended my Christian faith. I refused to except logic on account of not wanting to upset “my lord and savior”. I believed certain things because I was told I had to our I was basically going to hell. At the time I couldn’t even think of questioning god because of all the friends I would lose. So I know that’s really how it is.

It just sucks a little don’t it.

If it weren’t for all the bad things happening in the name of religions I could except the good things it is doing. Like giving people hope to get through their lives.

But I am ok with not knowing. I enjoy being free of conscious restrictions. Logic and reason can change your life.

Thought this was funny. As I was making the banner I stumbled across a link to an old website of mine. This is a flash intro for my old website I had back in 2003. Bring Me To Life

Christmas Follow Up

Photo by *Sally M*

Back to another 2.5 day work week and I have no idea what’s going on for this weekend. I feel like the more I work the more my friends kind of drift off and do their own thing. I’m not one to take it personally … its just kinda depressing.

But anyways, the one person who would hang out with me Sat night was my good ol friend George. It was an interesting night. Saw some girl I recognized and took a stab at remembering her name … I was way off. At least I tried.

Then there was a fight back inside the bar, which led outside the bar, which apparently kept going because we walked by the kids fighting again on our walk home. Fighting = Immature. Sorry I hate it.

So 20SB Secret Santa came and went. Apparently I’m a crappy Santa but oh well I tried. I ended up ordering something off of Amazon so I could get the most bang for my buck. The problem however is that Amazon’s estimated shipping times are about 6 days off so far. I’ll give it a few more days but I kinda feel bad. Kinda.

The present I received in turn was freakin awesome. It was THE Chuck Norris quote book. I’ve personally never been a big fan of Mr. Norris or that website but that book had me and my friends rolling. So Thank You whoever you are for that special little bit of Christmas awesome.

So now it’s back to work for a couple days and another long weekend. I can’t wait even tho I have no idea what I’m doing yet. Regardless I hope everyone else has a Happy New Year.

PS (Watching Religulous on Christmas eve was awesome)

Let Me Save Me

Someone put a “Let Jesus save you” pamphlet on my car … before a rain storm … which led to an interesting combo of leaves and Jesus ink smeared on my window.

I wonder how many of those pamphlets actually work. Are people seriously opening these things up and finding God right on the inside sleeve. Maybe I’m opening it wrong.

I just really don’t see the point. I don’t go putting pamphlets about my company on their cars … and my company could actually save them some money.

To make the situation worse, I think it was my neighbor downstairs, and I’m pretty sure she holds bible studies in her living room every Thursday. I used to rock a good bible study. Whip out some nasty proverbs that defined how my morals build better character. Now I write my own proverbs. Like….

People grow old and die unless they kill themselves.

That one’s a little dark. How about …

Be nice to your friends or they’ll talk behind your back

That’s more like it. So back to my main point I made when I first started this blog. You live your life and I’ll live mine. We can co-exist and talk about life … just not about how you’ve been “saved”.

Flashback Sunday: God Camp


So I went to camp up at Lake Winnipesaukee in New Hampshire from when I was about 8 till I was 16. Regardless of the fact that it was a Christian camp … it was a lot of fun. I spent my entire summers of my last 2 years there I loved it so much. I mean who wouldn’t … we had “the blob” from the movie heavyweights (that big balloon you jump on to launch people in to the lake).

My older years at the camp were my favorite. Especially the CIT years. The camp had an awesome program of activities:

  • White water rafting
  • 15 days of hiking
  • 7 days in a canoe up on the Allagash in Maine
  • 10 days up in Chibougamau in Canada
  • 3 days solo in the woods with no tent
  • 3 mile swim across a lake

It was all awesome and I have a lot of great memories… but one sticks out.

The CITs were broken up into 1st years and 2nd years. When I was a 2nd year we had just gone on one of the best hikes I had ever been on. I took a lot of pictures on this specific hike and was looking forward to bragging about some of the things I had seen.

Well there was this squirrel. He made it his mission to steal every piece of small electrical equipment he could get ahold of so he could dismantle is and use it for his nest. He especially enjoyed eating our batteries out on a rock in front of the cabin where we could see him as if to mock us. Needless to say both my camera and my cell phone fell victim to his quest. I was furious. We actually found the squirrels nest some time later with my camera torn to shreds and my phone scratched to all hell.

Then one day we caught the squirrel in a mouse trap. It’s tail was chopped off by the trap and it had gone into shock. We brought the squirrel about a mile down the road and set it free by the girls camp. We didn’t want to kill it but we didn’t want it messing with our stuff anymore.

About a week later the squirrel is back in our cabin trying to steal our stuff again. The little bugger was relentless … tailless and all. So we immediately went on the offensive. Next thing you know there are 12 guys running around with lacrosse sticks and canoe paddles trying to swat down and shoo out a technology loving squirrel. Unfortunately in the scuffle the squirrel hit its head and knocked itself out while trying to jump across the room.

Next thing i know, one of the other 2nd years comes walking into the cabin wearing nothing but the squirrel’s pelt and he says “Anybody want them some squirrel with hot sauce”. I was 17 and had been out in the woods for 7 weeks … so of course I ate me some squirrel.

So that was God camp in a nutshell. Well, that and a lot of capture the flag.

Things I Can't Stand

I find myself repeating myself over and over again when rationalizing the things that I say and do. I usually just wouldn’t give a dam but for my friends and family I’ll repeat myself as many times as they like. For the rest of you I’m making a list of things I can’t stand:

  • People that don’t have good relationships with their parents. I understand that in some cases there are good reasons to not have relationships. This is more about a girl I know that is a bitch to her mom for no good reason. She is also incredibly spoiled … but ya. I’m a family man.
  • People that aren’t open minded. This ones simple. I hate people that refuse to step outside of their little safe box.
  • People that are racist. I’m pretty laid back when it comes to this stuff but people in my family have not been so lucky.
  • People that try and push religion down other people’s throats. I went to 8 years of christian camp, youth group, bible studies and catacombs by choice. It was a great time in my life but I have since moved past it. Your not going to teach me anything I don’t already know. I choose to have my own beliefs or disbeliefs of my own and you can enjoy the same privilege. Lets keep it that way.
  • People that think they know everything. Because I know I know everything and that’s all that matters.
  • People that judge me by my age and appearance. If everyone started judging everyone else by how they presented themselves and their accomplishments we would be a lot better off as a society.
  • Parents that shelter their children. I was a camp counselor for years and have always loved working with kids. My younger stepbrother is one of the coolest kids I know. A lot of over concerned parents ruin their children’s youth by instilling fear. They do this out of compassion and their own fear but they don’t realize the real danger they’re doing. The odds that something will happen to your child are only decreased by such a microcosm of a percentage that its not ever worth trying to figure out. The truth is that child psychologists believe that your kid is alot less likely to have a normal social life when they grow up do to a lack of basic survival skills we develop in adolescence. Basically… let your kids be kids.
  • The Police. I know a few cool ones … but they’re about to retire so we’re all screwed. This is just because of my own personal relations with cops up to this point.
Well that’s about it for now. I’m getting to tired to think.

Pursuit of Happiness

The Meaning of Life

I personally believe that the meaning of life is simply to survive. Look at any other form of life and you’ll see that this is a simple universal truth:

  • Trees growing toward the sun looking for energy
  • Micro-organisms multiplying
  • Animals hunt or are hunted

But I want to expand this thought process a little further.

Throughout evolution we have learned how to survive and now we strive to survive in comfort. It’s now less and less about shelter, food, water, companionship and more about the ease of acquiring and using these resources.

So with survival on the back burner … now what?

Pursuit of happiness

We’ve spent so much time “growing” as a race and “learning” as intelligent beings we have forgotten some simple truths. Surviving should be the easy part of life … whats the point in living unless you’re not having fun. The problem is society teaches us otherwise. We are taught what’s right and wrong at a young age and we still live our lives on morals that are really just ancient trains of thought. Trains of thought that were made up to explain the unexplainable.

We need to undo the mess and start living a little more:

  • Look at life with a fresh set of eyes
  • Live a little
  • Do something random
  • Do something you’ve never done before
  • Do something you never thought you would do
  • Make a few mistakes

Once people stop living in this filter we’ve created for ourselves, happiness becomes the side-effect.

I believe there for i am …

I went to a christian camp for about 8 years of my life, attended youth group regularly and come from a generally pretty christian upbringing. So are you surprised I don’t believe in god. I’ve heard all the arguments and it pretty much comes down to one thing with all of them, faith.

Faith = Ignorance

I believe in no thing greater than man, except maybe physics and math. Its just we know that people have been tripping on hallucinogens since way before christ, and when that fact is bought up it is ignored. Of course we are going to make up stories for things we don’t understand. But now with advances in science and technology, why do we hold on to these ancient virtues and ideals.

This leads into my next point. The Secret. *COUGH* GAY *COUGH*. Im sorry for all you Law of Attraction freaks out there but let me cut you in on a little secret. You get what you work hard for. If you finally got that promotion or car you always wanted, congratulations, you did it, not the cosmos as a reaction to your wants and needs. I just hate the idea of someone making a shitload of money off of gullible, yet able minded, individuals. What they need is a good kick in the ass instead of wasting money on books and motivational tapes about the secret.

So man up and take credit for your accomplishments, you deserve it.